5 minute read
I often get the impression that there are things not worth fighting for. It could be a dead-end job, a relationship, craving for the attention of people who just don’t bring value to your life. But can one just let it go!?
Blogs (not unlike this one) advise you to fight for your dreams, but at the same time, one can be objective and reevaluate one’s dreams carefully. Are they really the best for the person in question?
Sometimes people get obsessed with fantasies although they don’t realize what they are really struggling to achieve. The result might look amazing, but they are not prepared to suffer through the work necessary to achieve something. The question here would be – do I need this?
We always fall in love with illusions, which happens to be our representations of how we imagine the future to be. It is OK, of course, because in fact, nobody can see the future. Nevertheless, after some time reality slowly unveils, the most important ability is to take a step back and reevaluate the situation. Everything worth fighting for requires some sort of sacrifice and it is up to you and you only to decide if you are willing to make it. There is no shame in giving up on a path that is not yours and one can and should take pride in the flexibility to switch lanes when it is necessary.
If you are only in love with the fantasy of achieving something without any real-life proof that you will enjoy to a satisfactory degree both the efforts and the benefits of it t… well, let it go! It is permitted!
The period of grief
I will take for example the dysfunctional relationships. You probably think that the other will change; you probably hope that your love is strong enough and you will put up with all, well one day you will have to grow a pair and give it up forever.
Why is it important? Psychology shows us that grief is this tough period from the moment you lose something or someone dear to you and the moment when you can go on with your life again. From my experience, it tends to last 1 to 3 months. This period of grief is the time that your mind needs to assume the loss and the absence and go on, achieving inner peace and acceptance of the unfortunate event. It is relevant to all kinds of loss.
It is not necessarily a bad sign if it takes you more than 2 or 3 months to calm yourself and go on with your life after you lose someone or something. Although I would suspect that there is a high probability that you haven’t given up the idea of achieving what you initially wanted.
It is OK to re-evaluate your chances of changing the approach and finally get it, but you can’t continuously do the same thing expecting a different result. You can see if there is any potential rise in your chances to achieve what you want and if there isn’t.
You are allowed to give up the giving up too!
Only by giving it up forever the idea that you certainly have to cling to all your aspirations and decisions, you will set yourself free from the emotional baggage of past events. There is no matter what would/could have happened – it didn’t happen and that is all! Give up all your hope in the “someday” chimera and focus on what else you can do with your life, love, hopes, and dreams now!