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This is not a motivational post, in which I tell you that the pain eventually passes and that true happiness is in the small everyday stuff. Actually, sometimes pain never goes away, sometimes there is no one to share it with.
Everything is temporal, without a reason. It just IS. Life is not static and that’s how it works. Continue reading →
2 minute read
In my article Why “Dress For The Job You Want” Is Actually a Damn Good Advice I emphasized on the importance of the clothing when you try to blend in a community or especially in a job profile. Even though cloths matter, my advice to you was to be yourself no matter what. But how can you do both? How can you change your style radically and feel comfortable with it?
Sometimes it is tough because it is not in everyone’s nature to experiment with clothes. People who dress the same way for years often receive a great sense of personality when they put their favorite clothes on. If they really have to change it, they usually feel awkward and false.
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This is my simple advice to all the fathers in the world. Just remember that your opinion about her appearance will be following her (or haunting) throughout all her life. Shall I explain to you why?
Because: Continue reading →
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Getting a job is like finding a new boyfriend. You have to be emotionally prepared to find the right one; you should know what you want; you shouldn’t seem desperate and you should be really careful what you wear in order to attract the ones who are suitable for you.
You are already aware that while it may be fine to go to a job interview for a waitress wearing a short skirt, it is extremely unprofessional to be dressed the same way on an interview for a lawyer. When you get invited to a job interview try to figure out what is the unofficial dress code in the company. It is essential to be visually recognized as one of the team before you even have the chance to say “hello”. Continue reading →
2 minute read
You will often hear me say that if there is compatibility and chemistry between two people, things between them just click easily – without games, without unnecessary drama, without desperate attempts to attract someone’s attention. If you have to put a lot of efforts in order to trick the other into being in a relationship with you, this relationship is just not worth it.
The moment when you meet someone with similar interests and values, who is attracted to you, things between you will gust happen.
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As a therapist, I would never advise my clients to break up with someone or to do anything possible (and impossible) to make the relationship work. It is up to you to decide if a relationship has a future or not, but it is hard. One of my greatest achievements is helping a client establish better communication with his girlfriend. He wanted to fight for a relationship that I personally would never tolerate. It was important for him and now he is happy with her, even though a year ago she used to make his life miserable.
Figuring out what you want exactly is a hard task and it takes years to be achieved, but once you know yourself better you will be able to sort out the relationships that you can keep and the ones that you shouldn’t.
2 minute read
There are millions of books about how bad parenting may damage children for life; psychologists work hard to help people overcome the traumatic childhood; some of you probably suffer from psychological issues related to lack of attention, abandoning parent, child abuse etc. But here’s a thing, which might surprise you.
Good parents also might have screwed us up.
Here are some examples for things that your parents might have done, willing to give you all the love and affection in the world and nevertheless, at a later stage, their actions might have been the cause of some toxic behaviors or personal issues.
Have you ever experienced a much higher sexual arousal when you have been away from your partner for a while? Of course you have. The reencounter after some time spent apart is one of the greatest and also most common turn-ons.
It is the desire for reconnection, for discovering the other and the feeling that somehow you are about to conquer your long term partner, no matter that for a long time you have considered her/ him “yours”.
A friend of mine is a molecular biologist and she shared with me that usually when she meets new people and they ask her what she does for living the answer causes a long uncomfortable silence.
Fortunately or not it is not the same when I tell someone that I am a Psychoanalysis PhD, nevertheless there are a bunch of silly questions that almost always come up. That’s why I decided to respond to them in an article and maybe bust some myths about the psychoanalysis.
This article is really more about my personal opinion and much less about any of the psychological theories that I have been studying. After all, on the question monogamy or polygamy everyone decides for oneself. For instance I have been wondering all my life.
Let’s face it – life is not a fairy tale. Not everything happens according to the best case scenario. It is just impossible. There will be a lot of losses, disappointment and regret, the important thing is to go ahead somehow.